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18 November 2013

Aisling needs a great big fat M.Fing S.O.B RANT (in English)

Aisling needs a great big fat M.Fing S.O.B RANT

This post originally flew out of me in Irish on 12.11.12 (see below). The singer/songwriter mentioned is coming back for another bunch of gigs, so I thought I’d translate this for my non-Irish-speaking/reading readers - just in case I send them an invite.

RSVP or LFF? Or More German than the Germans Or Tips on how to keep your blood pressure down anyone? (Take your pick)

About three months ago I virtually met a singer/songwriter. He was on tour in Ireland and the UK to promote his new cd. He was asking if anyone would be interested in organising a “House Concert” for him. I sent a message to him immediately saying I was on board, welcome very much.

After two months of messaging to and from the UK and all around my own county, I managed to secure three concerts. It wasn’t easy, but I did it. With pleasure, for fun, for myself.

When I tell you this is the first time I ever organised a house concert, believe me. Although it just ran through my mind a half an hour ago, that I played at a house concert myself in the USA when I was nine years old. But as Aisling often says, that’s one for another day!

Anywho, with only a fortnight to go before the first concert, I sent 30 (thirty) invitations to friends of mine, by text message and/or by email – to people who I know to be interested in music, in culture, in language, in drink, in food, in craic. In their midst a *good* few people who are working in the Arts, teaching about the Arts, earning money through “lecturing” about working in the Arts, earning money by advising people to go working in the Arts. And to people who are working as musicians, as singer/songwriters goddammit, *working*. Do you get my drift?

I have received ONE ANSWER and there are three days left.

What the devil is WRONG with people??? We are in the middle of an economic downturn. Someone is bringing a musician of the calibre of our own John Spillane, or Ger Wolfe, to people’s back door. There will be no entrance fee, but we will be passing the hat. Just as if you were walking down Grafton Street and you heard a busker – maybe you’d throw in a few bob, or maybe you wouldn’t – depending on whether or not you enjoyed it, and also on how much, and whether or not you could afford to donate.

There will be a snack provided on the night, so that people don’t starve. I’ll be making it. Voluntarily. With pleasure. Although I wouldn’t mind at this very moment, and me mad as hell and the blood pressure rising by the word, whether or not the old buggers should starve or not. The other 29 people who didn’t bother their royal arses to even ANSWER MY INVITATION, I mean. Not you JB.

Is it maybe that they didn’t understand the “RSVP” bit I wrote at the bottom of my invitation? The next friggin time it’ll be RSVFnP. Innit?

Silence is golden me friggin arse!

I love Germans. You ask them a question and they ANSWER YOU. Is it too German of me to expect or to desire an ANSWER??? Maybe I’m just more German than the Germans.

Anyway like, I LOVE getting an ANSWER when I ask a question. – Yes, no, maybe, f*** off! – I don’t care WHAT answer, but an ANSWER!!! I believe it’s rude to ignore something. Especially something as unusual as this. Ok, a birthday party invite – “been-there-done-that-there’ll-be-hundreds-of-people-going-and-they-won’t-even-notice-if-I-don’t-reply”. But something as unusual as a professional singer/songwriter coming to do a private concert in a house around the corner from you!

When this very same musician is as famous (in this side of the world) as are John Spillane and Ger Wolfe, or David Gray, it’ll be those very same wicked wee wiry waifs who’ll be answering my invites. But maybe THEY WON’T. Because I may very well not be sending invites to the slimey little rotters!!!

And don’t TALK to me about that referendum (obviously outdated reference. ANA) or I’ll throw a stone at you!

Rant off. The day I wrote the original article was 12.11.12. I LOVED PALINDROMES then, and I love them still.

Aisling Ní Acamé welcomes corrections of grammatical or typo errors which I, SHE, didn’t see. She also welcomes suggestions to help keep the blood pressure within conservatively healthy levels. Laissez faire maybe? Or LFF – laissez f****** faire.